Creepy and Gross

I'm not sure what the back story to this is, but I assume it's pretty creepy and gross.

Delicious Urinal Mat

We recently got new urinal mats in the men's bathrooms at work. For the ladies who are unaware, urinal mats are flat, little plastic mats that sit in the bottom of the urinal to help prevent splashing, both from the flushing water and from guys with high pressure. I assume they also help to keep half eaten sub sandwiches and cigarettes from being flushed down as well. Sometimes there are urinal cakes that sit atop the mats. They help to hide the smell of asparagus and 6 hour old, processed beer.

Our company upped the ante recently and invested in urinal mats that are embedded with some kind of addictive, sweet smelling perfume. I actually really like this smell. I find myself going pee 8 - 10 times more a day than normal so that I can spend a few intoxicating minutes with this smell.

On top of it all, the urinal mat has a very pretty orange transparent color to it. I almost feel sad peeing on top of it. It almost looks and smells... edible. That's right. EDIBLE.

I assumed that everyone else in the office felt the same about the urinal mat, so I decided to post a warning to keep everyone from attempting to take a bite out of the mat.

THE URINAL


THE DELICIOUS LOOKING MAT


THE WARNING

Sadly, my warning failed. Here is a photo of the mat from this morning:


I hope they put the poison control number on speed dial before diving in.

All paper products removed from bathroom prank

Some signs were recently posted in the bathrooms at work outlining some additional resource saving measures:

SIGN POSTED AT URINAL



A COPY OF THE SIGN


You know that someday, it will come down to something similar (like the three shells in the bathrooms from Demolition Man.)

Being tall has its advantages