Showing posts with label Burger King. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Burger King. Show all posts
There is such a thing as a bad milkshake
For my birthday (well, it was on my birthday) a few coworkers decided we should have a milkshake taste test. Seeing as we are not located in the culinary mecca of the city, we only had a few places to choose from so we did the best with what we had. We tested chocolate shakes from:
Steak and Shake (chocolate and Hershey's Special Dark)
Burger King
Wendy's
Dairy Queen
Steak and Shake Chocolate
The Steak and Shake chocolate was a very good chocolate shake. There was an even chocolate taste and it felt like real ice cream. Some comments included, "light chocolate taste", "really good" and "thin."
Burger King Chocolate
When we took the lid off the Burger King chocolate, we were confused. The shake looked white. An initial taste seemed to suggest that there was a light chocolate taste, but that it was underwhelming. Our only guess was that it was white chocolate and that BK got the order wrong. We tucked in and it was complete crap. Comments included, "marshmallow fluff," "cream" and "poor white chocolate." Oddly enough, one of our testers actually enjoyed the taste. I have to assume he hates chocolate. Fortunately he did like this shake because while finishing it off, he discovered what the problem was:
It seems the way Burger King makes their shakes is to stick the chocolate in the bottom, add the neutral milk shake liquid and then mix it up. It seems that they forgot to mix this one up.
Steak and Shake Hershey's Special Dark
The Steak and Shake Hershey's Special Dark shake was also tasty, if not a bit too chocolaty. It had a similar texture to the first Steak and Shake shake. (remember this: Metro Station - Shake It) One taster has problem with the froze chocolate chips being disconcerting to eat with the smooth shake. Other comments included, "smooth," "a bit too chocolaty" and "rich."
Frosty Chocolate Shake
Let's get one thing straight. A Frosty is not a shake. A Frosty is a frosty and I don't want to delve into religious beliefs here, but I assume that if there is a heaven, there are Frostys there and if there is a hell, there are none.
That being said, Wendy's felt the need to shame the Frosty by offering shakes. I did think for a moment that if you took a Frosty and let it melt a little, you'd get a shake. I've never eaten a Frosty slow enough to see it melt, so I was a bit curious. Maybe this might be delicious.
Wrong.
The Wendy's Chocolate shake is terrible. Too chocolaty and not smooth. Other comments included, "madness" and "worse than a Frosty."
The can only assume that this chocolate shake idea came out after Dave Thomas died or right before and it killed him.
Dairy Queen Chocolate Shake
Expectations were low for the Dairy Queen chocolate shake. I mean, it's Dairy Queen.
We were wrong.
The Dairy Queen shake was delicious. Smooth, a great chocolate taste. The classic chocolate shake. I realize that the Dairy Queen shake may not be hand dipped and mostly processed, but it was an awesome shake.
In the end, the Dairy Queen chocolate was rated highest and the Steak and Shake chocolate came in a close second.
And just so you are aware, the guy who thought the BK shake was delicious had all his votes thrown out.
Shake shake shake shake shake it.
Steak and Shake (chocolate and Hershey's Special Dark)
Burger King
Wendy's
Dairy Queen
Steak and Shake Chocolate
The Steak and Shake chocolate was a very good chocolate shake. There was an even chocolate taste and it felt like real ice cream. Some comments included, "light chocolate taste", "really good" and "thin."
Burger King Chocolate
When we took the lid off the Burger King chocolate, we were confused. The shake looked white. An initial taste seemed to suggest that there was a light chocolate taste, but that it was underwhelming. Our only guess was that it was white chocolate and that BK got the order wrong. We tucked in and it was complete crap. Comments included, "marshmallow fluff," "cream" and "poor white chocolate." Oddly enough, one of our testers actually enjoyed the taste. I have to assume he hates chocolate. Fortunately he did like this shake because while finishing it off, he discovered what the problem was:
It seems the way Burger King makes their shakes is to stick the chocolate in the bottom, add the neutral milk shake liquid and then mix it up. It seems that they forgot to mix this one up.
Steak and Shake Hershey's Special Dark
The Steak and Shake Hershey's Special Dark shake was also tasty, if not a bit too chocolaty. It had a similar texture to the first Steak and Shake shake. (remember this: Metro Station - Shake It) One taster has problem with the froze chocolate chips being disconcerting to eat with the smooth shake. Other comments included, "smooth," "a bit too chocolaty" and "rich."
Frosty Chocolate Shake
Let's get one thing straight. A Frosty is not a shake. A Frosty is a frosty and I don't want to delve into religious beliefs here, but I assume that if there is a heaven, there are Frostys there and if there is a hell, there are none.
That being said, Wendy's felt the need to shame the Frosty by offering shakes. I did think for a moment that if you took a Frosty and let it melt a little, you'd get a shake. I've never eaten a Frosty slow enough to see it melt, so I was a bit curious. Maybe this might be delicious.
Wrong.
The Wendy's Chocolate shake is terrible. Too chocolaty and not smooth. Other comments included, "madness" and "worse than a Frosty."
The can only assume that this chocolate shake idea came out after Dave Thomas died or right before and it killed him.
Dairy Queen Chocolate Shake
Expectations were low for the Dairy Queen chocolate shake. I mean, it's Dairy Queen.
We were wrong.
The Dairy Queen shake was delicious. Smooth, a great chocolate taste. The classic chocolate shake. I realize that the Dairy Queen shake may not be hand dipped and mostly processed, but it was an awesome shake.
In the end, the Dairy Queen chocolate was rated highest and the Steak and Shake chocolate came in a close second.
And just so you are aware, the guy who thought the BK shake was delicious had all his votes thrown out.
Shake shake shake shake shake it.
The BK Stacker Scientific Study
The price scientists over at Burger King think they have got their stuff together. They came out with a pricing system for the Single Stacker, Double Stacker and Triple Stacker at $1, $2 and $3 respectively. I decided to do some research to see if those scientists went to a school that doesn't have collective bargaining rights.
I went out and bought three Single Stackers, one Double Stacker and one Triple Stacker.
My server was Elbert!
Because of science, I weighed them:
Single Stacker = 4 oz
Double Stacker = 5.6 oz
Triple Stacker = 7 oz
The Single Stacker is 380 calories. That's 380 calories per $1 or $.25 an ounce.
The Double Stacker is 560 calories. That's 280 calories per $1 or $.36 an ounce
The Triple Stacker is 650 calories. That's 216.6 calories per $1 or $.42 an ounce.
The bigger the sandwich, the more you pay per calorie/ounce. That doesn't seem right!
The Single Stacker is comprised of a bun, one hamburger patty, two "segments" of bacon, a slice of cheese and some strange sauce that I will not be mentioning again.
Here's what the three Single Stackers look like separated.
The Double Stacker is comprised of a bun, two hamburger patties, three bacon segments, a slice of cheese and the sauce that I said I wasn't going to mention, but forgot.
The Triple Stacker is comprised of a bun, three hamburger patties, three bacon segments, two slices of cheese and more of the you know what.
There are three patties in there. One of them is hiding in the cholesterol.
By the way, the people over at Burger King think this is what the Triple Stacker looks like:
Here's what mine looked like:
So just by looking at these components, I can tell you are getting screwed. For starters, there should be two slices of cheese on the Double and three on the Triple. And the bacon should be spilling out of the Triple.
So you could take a Single Stacker and a Double stacker for $3.00 and you would get 2 buns, three hamburger patties, two slices of cheese and five bacon. I call this the "1 + 2 = 4."
Or, you could take the three Single Stackers, remove the tops of two and stack them all. I call this the "Real Triple You Stupid Price Scientists."
Or you could just say "fuck it" and stack everything in one bun. I call this "The Lent Buster."
That's right.
OUMNNNNUNMNNNN
Fis engu mmn na frengh!
Yeah! Take that Price Scientists!
CONCLUSION: The price scientists at Burger King are idiots. Just buy singles. You can feed the ducks with the leftover bread.
I went out and bought three Single Stackers, one Double Stacker and one Triple Stacker.
Single Stacker = 4 oz
Double Stacker = 5.6 oz
Triple Stacker = 7 oz
The Single Stacker is 380 calories. That's 380 calories per $1 or $.25 an ounce.
The Double Stacker is 560 calories. That's 280 calories per $1 or $.36 an ounce
The Triple Stacker is 650 calories. That's 216.6 calories per $1 or $.42 an ounce.
The bigger the sandwich, the more you pay per calorie/ounce. That doesn't seem right!
The Single Stacker is comprised of a bun, one hamburger patty, two "segments" of bacon, a slice of cheese and some strange sauce that I will not be mentioning again.
Here's what the three Single Stackers look like separated.
The Double Stacker is comprised of a bun, two hamburger patties, three bacon segments, a slice of cheese and the sauce that I said I wasn't going to mention, but forgot.
The Triple Stacker is comprised of a bun, three hamburger patties, three bacon segments, two slices of cheese and more of the you know what.
By the way, the people over at Burger King think this is what the Triple Stacker looks like:
Here's what mine looked like:
So you could take a Single Stacker and a Double stacker for $3.00 and you would get 2 buns, three hamburger patties, two slices of cheese and five bacon. I call this the "1 + 2 = 4."
Or, you could take the three Single Stackers, remove the tops of two and stack them all. I call this the "Real Triple You Stupid Price Scientists."
Or you could just say "fuck it" and stack everything in one bun. I call this "The Lent Buster."
That's right.
OUMNNNNUNMNNNN
Fis engu mmn na frengh!
Yeah! Take that Price Scientists!
CONCLUSION: The price scientists at Burger King are idiots. Just buy singles. You can feed the ducks with the leftover bread.
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