My Pineapple Heart
Guy
Hi, anyone sitting here?
Girl
Not anymore.
I’ve seen you here at the St.
James a couple of times.
Oh yeah, you were playing pool?
You… you noticed me?
Ha! No. It’s just that there’s a
pretty good chance that anyone coming here was or is going to play pool.
I can’t help but see that you have
a pineapple strapped to your chest.
Oh? Is it noticeable?
Well, it’s a small pineapple.
Smaller than normal.
His name is Charles, but I call
him Charlie.
Do you carry it in case of a
fruity drink emergency?
No.
Is it some kind of Japanese
fashion trend?
No.
Did you lose a bet?
This is my heart.
Your heart?
My heart. The mass of muscle that
beats endlessly and keeps us alive. My heart.
You mean it’s a symbol of your
heart.
Girl
No. My heart was taken from me.
Stolen?
Ripped out. Ripped right out. I was lying there on the
floor about to die, but I was able to reach Charlie. Somehow, I made it though.
I fashioned this sling to keep it on me.
Who took your heart?
A guy. His name is Joe.
Is he the guy you come here with?
Yeah. Used to.
So Joe, I assume, broke up with
you, took your heart and this pineapple heart is the replacement.
The pineapple is perfect for me to
replace my heart. It’s smaller than normal. It’s spikey in all sorts of places.
It’s ugly. The core is rough and gritty. But if you know how to work your way
in there, there is sweetness inside. Was. Not sure anymore.
I’ve seen you here before. I’ve always wanted to talk to you, but you’ve
always been with a guy. With Joe.
You’ve been watching me?
Not in a creepy way.
When you watch someone more than
once and you don’t say hello, it’s creepy.
I think that Joe guy would not
have appreciated me coming over to say hello.
Girl
Joe didn’t appreciate much.
Guy
How long are you going to wear
that?
Forever. Until I’m dead. Whichever
comes first.
Listen. I’m just the creepy guy
playing pool that stares as you, but you’ve got to know that there’re other
guys out there.
That… that is so cheesy.
What I mean is this: this
pineapple isn’t your heart. And Joe didn’t rip it out of you. You gave it to
him. You let him have it. And he broke it.
Yes. I guess you are right.
But hearts aren’t made to give.
They are meant to be shared. Equally. With someone who I… someone you loves you
as much as you love them.
I… I think I know what you are
saying.
Yes?
I’ve been blind this whole time!
Yes!
I don’t need to give my heart
away, I need to share it.
Yes! Share it!
Thank you! I’m going to go find
Joe and give it another chance. Thank
you!
But! But I..
I did it all wrong the first time around. This time, things will
be different. Thank you!
(She kisses him on the cheek.)
GIRL
I don’t need this anymore. (She
removes the pineapple and throws it on the bar.)
Joe! (She leaves.)
The guy stands up and watches her
go. He then clutches his chest and bends over in pain. With a gasp, he reaches for the pineapple and
puts it on.
